Respect, entitlement, and some things on my mind.

Totally honestly, the "
I wanna have your babies!"
messages make me personally uncomfortable, but not in any sort of important way--just a little "
um, okay then"
and then shrug it off because, really, not a big deal. But I think you can definitely tell the difference between friendly joking and stuff that's actively mean-spirited, and I'm more worried and freaked out by the latter.

You know you are not crazy when you can identify crazy ;
)
I love that everyone is joining in on this conversation, as I think it is what keeps us grounded. Not many fans do this kind of reflection, especially on the internet. This conversation shows a lovely level of maturity and dedication. God, I love you all!

Fandoms have always been an interesting topic and I even joke around about making some sort of documentary about fans. What makes us tick? How do fans end up crossing the line? Why do they cross the line?
What makes me sad is that their are factions and troops (in general) that try to "
one up"
or "
destroy"
each other. It is fruitless and ridiculous based on the fact that we all like the same exact thing!
I've not been faced with any negativity from other groups so far concerning FotC (but I have with other fandoms I've been in). I mean, it was fun for me to say hi to so many different fans at the Orpheum. Even at the Largo, it felt nice when someone who even vaguely knows you says "
hi!"
, and even better when people you know better give out free hugs!
Flighties have gotten most of my attention;
Flighties are most active in reaching out to other fans and embracing them. I mean, look at this board! So many great, interesting people to converse with!

Irene, I'm pretty sure you bring nothing but positive memories to Bret and Jemaine. You were so humble and genuine with them. I mean, Flanny trusted you enough to take you back there without knowing you too well. You do not reek of crazy, my dear. You reek of awesome. Now, if you were the kind of crazy who made the Sheeple out of human hair... " title="" border="0"/>

parapluie wrote:Totally honestly, the "
I wanna have your babies!"
messages make me personally uncomfortable, but not in any sort of important way--just a little "
um, okay then"
and then shrug it off because, really, not a big deal. But I think you can definitely tell the difference between friendly joking and stuff that's actively mean-spirited, and I'm more worried and freaked out by the latter.

Everyone has their levels of humor and fun. I do not really joke around like that myself, but I do not like to be a party pooper to those having a bit of a fun go. Yeah, "
shrugging"
is a perfect word for how I handle it, too " title="" border="0"/>
I guess one of the positives of the internet is the choice to take a break from it when conversations are going in a different direction of the fun that is in a personal level of comfortable.

paranoidandroid wrote:

parapluie wrote:Totally honestly, the "
I wanna have your babies!"
messages make me personally uncomfortable, but not in any sort of important way--just a little "
um, okay then"
and then shrug it off because, really, not a big deal. But I think you can definitely tell the difference between friendly joking and stuff that's actively mean-spirited, and I'm more worried and freaked out by the latter.

Everyone has their levels of humor and fun. I do not really joke around like that myself, but I do not like to be a party pooper to those having a bit of a fun go. Yeah, "
shrugging"
is a perfect word for how I handle it, too " title="" border="0"/>
I guess one of the positives of the internet is the choice to take a break from it when conversations are going in a different direction of the fun that is in a personal level of comfortable.

I want to have your babies, FOTCmb members. ;
)

But in all seriousness, this topic is wonderful... it's great to give a little insight to such an interesting albeit rarely discussed topic. I like hearing the different opinions of various board members on the subject...

I love this thread and everything you guys have said. I've definitely had troubles explaining to my friends and mother that I'm not freakishly scary obsessed, which usually make me ask myself "
am I?"
. which I guess is a good sign. Like you guys have said, a crazy person never asks themselves if they're crazy. I remember agonizing over whether I should wear my fotc T shirt to one of their shows because I didn't want to seem too much of a fan (which is silly. Who cares if you wear a t shirt right?). I wanted to look tone down a bit. Like a fan if she was just going to the zoo or the supermarket. Casual fan. I've had nightmares where I run into them at CVS and my cellphone goes off. my ring tone happens to be "
most beautiful girl"
. I die of embarrassment and they back away slowly, heading for the exit.

And I'm so thankful that no one is catty here. Some of my few friends that are fans make somewhat catty remarks about their fiances. Although they're in jest, they still bother me. I just wish them all the best.

I guess I'm just fearful that the guys would become freaked out by all these weird myspace comments and stop responding to us and become less personable with their fans. I think I would if I was in their shoes. fans scare me. But it so great to hear how they're handling it, and that they're not taking it all too seriously. in words of oscar wilde "
life is too important to be taken seriously"
.

Alright. That's all I had to say.

oh wait... one more thing... YOU GUYS ARE THE GREATEST!

I luv flighties and the FOTCMB

chickenkarma wrote:I luv flighties and the FOTCMB

Yis! *reaches out arms for massive flighty group hug*

ines wrote:

The ones that creep me out are the fans that write almost the same exact messages everyday about how they want them to "
have a nice day"
and what not. That actually seems creepier to me than some one saying they want to have their babies. I swear it's eerie how some fans try to act like they are totally normal yet leave the same creepy message almost everyday.
Creepy to me...maybe not to anyone else including the guys. Who knows for sure? Right? It's like they are in a Norman Bates type of fashion trying to be as normal as possible.

i agree. that's pretty freaky.

heidi wrote:I remember agonizing over whether I should wear my fotc T shirt to one of their shows because I didn't want to seem too much of a fan (which is silly. Who cares if you wear a t shirt right?). I wanted to look tone down a bit. Like a fan if she was just going to the zoo or the supermarket. Casual fan. I've had nightmares where I run into them at CVS and my cellphone goes off. my ring tone happens to be "
most beautiful girl"
. I die of embarrassment and they back away slowly, heading for the exit.

i know what you mean, i always go through the changes of clothes before any show wondering if i'll come off as an obvious crazy fan or just one of those fans with the attitude of "
yeah, i own a (insert band name here) shirt. this means i've seen them before. so im a better fan than you."

*Jumping in the group hug*

I LOVE YOU GUYS!

lixxx wrote:

ines wrote:

The ones that creep me out are the fans that write almost the same exact messages everyday about how they want them to "
have a nice day"
and what not. That actually seems creepier to me than some one saying they want to have their babies. I swear it's eerie how some fans try to act like they are totally normal yet leave the same creepy message almost everyday.
Creepy to me...maybe not to anyone else including the guys. Who knows for sure? Right? It's like they are in a Norman Bates type of fashion trying to be as normal as possible.

i agree. that's pretty freaky.

heidi wrote:I remember agonizing over whether I should wear my fotc T shirt to one of their shows because I didn't want to seem too much of a fan (which is silly. Who cares if you wear a t shirt right?). I wanted to look tone down a bit. Like a fan if she was just going to the zoo or the supermarket. Casual fan. I've had nightmares where I run into them at CVS and my cellphone goes off. my ring tone happens to be "
most beautiful girl"
. I die of embarrassment and they back away slowly, heading for the exit.

i know what you mean, i always go through the changes of clothes before any show wondering if i'll come off as an obvious crazy fan or just one of those fans with the attitude of "
yeah, i own a (insert band name here) shirt. this means i've seen them before. so im a better fan than you."

Yeah, my personal rule is just to look as attractive as possible. That way if you act crazy, at least your craziness gets downplayed by how cute you look on the outside. ;
)

liverz wrote:*Jumping in the group hug*

I LOVE YOU GUYS!

lixxx wrote:

i agree. that's pretty freaky.




i know what you mean, i always go through the changes of clothes before any show wondering if i'll come off as an obvious crazy fan or just one of those fans with the attitude of "
yeah, i own a (insert band name here) shirt. this means i've seen them before. so im a better fan than you."

Yeah, my personal rule is just to look as attractive as possible. That way if you act crazy, at least your craziness gets downplayed by how cute you look on the outside. ;
)

hahah Olivia!
good rule of thumb.
Cuteness rules ;
)

liverz wrote:

Yeah, my personal rule is just to look as attractive as possible. That way if you act crazy, at least your craziness gets downplayed by how cute you look on the outside. ;
)

My personal rule is to always wear yellow pants...and a shirt that doesn't even remotely match,but you act like it does ;
) " title="" border="0"/>

thedistantfuture wrote:

liverz wrote:

Yeah, my personal rule is just to look as attractive as possible. That way if you act crazy, at least your craziness gets downplayed by how cute you look on the outside. ;
)

My personal rule is to always wear yellow pants...and a shirt that doesn't even remotely match,but you act like it does ;
) " title="" border="0"/>

lol i like both of your rules my personal rule is to wear whatever the crap i want, whether it's a fan shirt or a cute outfit or yellow pants or what have you, as long as it makes me happy. bonus points if it gives you fodder for a clever ms comment, lol.

*dogpiles onto group hug*

thedistantfuture wrote:[quote author=liverz board=talk thread=990 post=23837 time=1219111214]

Yeah, my personal rule is just to look as attractive as possible. That way if you act crazy, at least your craziness gets downplayed by how cute you look on the outside. ;
)

hahahahahahaha

looking cute? Good thing Flighties have got this down to an art form (evidence found in "
Photos of You"
).

i think everyone's said what i've wanted to say! haha

fangirls are an inevitable part of any fandom. truthfully, i think everyone's a little fangirly for something but most of us are able to contain it [as long as you don't reach the level of jonas brothers fans you're okay]. there's really nothing you can do about it but ignore them.

of course there's always doubts whenever you wait outside the tour bus or alleyway...are you an obsessed fan whose sole mission is to touch them and have that ~love at first sight~ moment? or someone who just wants to say hello and thanks? what will they view you as? i think that, like someone said, if you're expressing doubts and/or questioning these things, you're okay. often times the crazier fans are the ones who don't realize that they may come off a little forward and scary.

as for the "
have my babies"
comments, i think they realize that it's all in good fun. they played it off pretty well at the sf show when two ladies shouted that at them.

heidi wrote:
in words of oscar wilde "
life is too important to be taken seriously"
.

Damn that bloke was clever. ;
)

This is an old topic and it hasnt been updated for a while but this thread is a tad bit comforting.

i've seen people be mean on forums of different websites;
quick to point out hw stupid some other members are just because theyre not standign right beside them. what generally shocked when i joined this board and WTF is hw generally nice people sre. We're just tlkin bout our favourite band and what theyre up to and hw they are getting on.

Fangirls can be scary and it proves hw strong the guys are: i would be freaking if somone showed me a picture of my lips!!?!?! i suppose i take things to heart but i dunno...they seem to have sturck the right balance.

Another thign bout this thread i found comforting is how glad i am that i feel sane again. I search thru all the topics and look and read at everything caus i just want to know what its like to meet the guys caus i never had...and doubt i ever will... Bar one or two no one else knows of FOTC, theyre more interested in more popular stuff like the biggest band out ryt nw. so wen i go off on the tangents most of my friends nod their heads but don't really know hw passionate it is to me. when i come on this board im tlkin to people who also go aww when they see a picture of bret or jemaine and laugh at funny photos etc. the only thing i fear is that when and if i do meet the guys...i myt just burst into dust ha.

Woo...i feel tons better! This is like free therapy!!

aom192 wrote:This is an old topic and it hasnt been updated for a while but this thread is a tad bit comforting.

i've seen people be mean on forums of different websites;
quick to point out hw stupid some other members are just because theyre not standign right beside them. what generally shocked when i joined this board and WTF is hw generally nice people sre. We're just tlkin bout our favourite band and what theyre up to and hw they are getting on.

Fangirls can be scary and it proves hw strong the guys are: i would be freaking if somone showed me a picture of my lips!!?!?! i suppose i take things to heart but i dunno...they seem to have sturck the right balance.

Another thign bout this thread i found comforting is how glad i am that i feel sane again. I search thru all the topics and look and read at everything caus i just want to know what its like to meet the guys caus i never had...and doubt i ever will... Bar one or two no one else knows of FOTC, theyre more interested in more popular stuff like the biggest band out ryt nw. so wen i go off on the tangents most of my friends nod their heads but don't really know hw passionate it is to me. when i come on this board im tlkin to people who also go aww when they see a picture of bret or jemaine and laugh at funny photos etc. the only thing i fear is that when and if i do meet the guys...i myt just burst into dust ha.

Woo...i feel tons better! This is like free therapy!!

Awwwwwwwwwwwwww.

*snuggling aom* " title="" border="0"/>


As I mentioned earlier in this thread, my first thought is always: "
How would I feel if I was in their position?"
The answer to a question like that depends on the perspective of the asker. My perspective: the world already has enough actual problems to keep us busy for the totality of our brief lives.

So I only takes things seriously when I feel they're important (social issues, political issues, environmental issues, safety issues, etc). Humor, sincerity, kindness, and enthusiasm make life worth living, and a community that doesn't embrace those things isn't one I'd ever want to be a part of.

Ami and Jess and the mods have been doing an amazing job of keeping this site fun and positive. It must be incredibly difficult, but they keep doing it for love.

DITTO!. . um. .to everything! Jeez, I've got nothing to add 'cause everyone's already said it all and I pretty much agree with all of it. " title="" border="0"/>

ok, not to be a dink (and im sure im going to come off that way), but if youre going to be on television and sell music commercially and whatnot, you need to understand that you may accumulate fans (both crazy and not crazy). its part of "
being famous"
, so to speak.

this may sound cold hearted or whatever, but i just dont really feel bad that people wait outside their shows to meet them and blah blah blah. i dont think there is anything wrong with wanting to meet your favorite band/actor. i personally just dont think its crazy. no one held a gun to their heads and told them they had to choose this career path. they could have done anything else with their lives and just played music as a hobby or whatever. they picked this, and whether you like it or not, all the fan stuff comes with it. i personally think its respectable and polite of "
famous people"
to meet their fans and show that they appreciate the fact that these people buy their records, watch their movies, etc. do i think that they HAVE to? no, of course not. but i do think its the courteous thing to do.


i have never been to a conchords show and i have never met either of them therefore i have no idea what they're like to their fans, so im not trying to bash them. i am just speaking generally. im not tryin' to hate!

meggy wrote:... no one held a gun to their heads and told them they had to choose this career path. they could have done anything else with their lives and just played music as a hobby or whatever. they picked this, and whether you like it or not, all the fan stuff comes with it. i personally think its respectable and polite of "
famous people"
to meet their fans and show that they appreciate the fact that these people buy their records, watch their movies, etc. do i think that they HAVE to? no, of course not. but i do think its the courteous thing to do.

Someone might tell herself she's going to wake up early every weekday to workout at the gym before work. But when she's lying under an electric blanket, and she's hungover, and it's snowing outside, she's probably going to hit the snooze alarm.

Before touring, a musician might say "
Meeting fans and giving them all photo ops and autographs is what a grateful artist does,"
but when she's been traveling by bus for weeks and her equipment keeps screwing up and she gets four hours of sleep every night and people keep asking her for favors and she plays two-hour shows only to be met with crowds of people asking for even more of her time, she sees how difficult it can be to do the grateful thing.


And that's why I appreciate Bret and Jemaine so much. They could have just neglected their fans, but they chose not to.

hellomyfriend wrote:

meggy wrote:... no one held a gun to their heads and told them they had to choose this career path. they could have done anything else with their lives and just played music as a hobby or whatever. they picked this, and whether you like it or not, all the fan stuff comes with it. i personally think its respectable and polite of "
famous people"
to meet their fans and show that they appreciate the fact that these people buy their records, watch their movies, etc. do i think that they HAVE to? no, of course not. but i do think its the courteous thing to do.

Someone might tell herself she's going to wake up early every weekday to workout at the gym before work. But when she's lying under an electric blanket, and she's hungover, and it's snowing outside, she's probably going to hit the snooze alarm.

Before touring, a musician might say "
Meeting my fans and giving them all photo ops and autographs is what a grateful artist does,"
but when she's been traveling by bus for weeks and her equipment keeps screwing up and she gets four hours of sleep every night and people keep asking her for favors and she plays two-hour shows only to be met with crowds of people asking for even more of her time, she sees how difficult it can be to do the grateful thing.


And that's why I appreciate Bret and Jemaine so much. They could have just neglected their fans, but they chose not to.

yis. what nikki said!

sharona65 wrote:

hellomyfriend wrote:


Someone might tell herself she's going to wake up early every weekday to workout at the gym before work. But when she's lying under an electric blanket, and she's hungover, and it's snowing outside, she's probably going to hit the snooze alarm.

Before touring, a musician might say "
Meeting my fans and giving them all photo ops and autographs is what a grateful artist does,"
but when she's been traveling by bus for weeks and her equipment keeps screwing up and she gets four hours of sleep every night and people keep asking her for favors and she plays two-hour shows only to be met with crowds of people asking for even more of her time, she sees how difficult it can be to do the grateful thing.


And that's why I appreciate Bret and Jemaine so much. They could have just neglected their fans, but they chose not to.

yis. what nikki said!

i did not mean bret and jemaine specifically, and i suppose what i said did sound a bit harsh, but i feel as though alot of people here are now questioning themselves because they waited outside a show to meet them. in my opinion, there is nothing wrong or crazy about that. i suppose that is basically what i was trying to say. like i said, i have never been to a conchords show. i have NO IDEA how they treat their fans because i have never experienced it first hand. they seem like stand up guys and it seems as though they actually do take the time to meet their fans, considering the fact that alot of people here have some experience with that. i think that is respectable of them. i understand that they cannot meet every single fan and cannot sign every single autograph. it just isnt physically possible, i get it.

but, there are downsides to every single career out there. sometimes you dont get much sleep and sometimes you have to work really really hard and not get much pay out.. its just part of having a career. completely. 100%. generally. speaking.

This thread was such a good idea. I have never been on any type of forum like this. Happy to say this is my first. I love all types of music and I have favorite actors and such. But when I came across these two hilarious guys on youtube I was like these guys have got it going on. And I don't mean there looks which of course you all know they do. But for real though they are so funny and there music is really good. I told a friend of mine about them and she said she had heard there music and liked it also. Though I remember her comparing them to Tenacious D and I don't agree with that at all. But anyway I'm getting off the subject. Basically I have never liked any band or anything like I like these guys. They are so talented and humble and seem like they really enjoy what they are doing. I would love to one day see them live and hopefully meet them. I don't know how I feel about the whole fandom thing. Yes, some people can be crazy but hopefully the "
normal"
fans out weigh the crazy ones. All I know is they make me happy and always make me laugh even when I've heard it like a thousand times.

Wow. First off...I haven't been on in forever. It's good to be back.

Second, this thread is really great. I actually heard of Bret and Jemaine back in 05 or so. In those days, if you typed "
Flight of the Conchords"
into YouTube, all you got was the HBO One Night Stand special. Flash forward to last summer, and people that I thought never even shared my sense of humor or taste, were telling me about Flight of Conchords. I will admit, I got a little territorial, only because they felt like my discovery. (I actually wrote an article about this very subject. Not sure if I've ever posted it here. If I haven't, I certainly will.) But, I don't claim any ownership over them at all.

I can't imagine what it's like for them. It has to be intense to have such an overwhelming overnight success. I will say, that I have loved coming on the board and chatting with all of you. You guys, do not overwhelm me. But I have pulled back quite a bit. When I found myself wondering whether or not I would get a birthday comment on Myspace from Jemaine, I decided I was this close to needing an intervention.

I adore the guys. I am so glad that I got to meet them after two shows this past summer. Would I do it again in a heartbeat? Yes. Would I be sad if they had just left afterward and not taken a photo? Yes. I can admit that. However, I never want to test their boundaries. The guys are unique, in that their boundaries are pretty easy to break through, and they're great sports. I just know that reading Myspace depresses me too now. It really and truly does.

But you folks here...you make me insanely happy.

And also, Bret and Jemaine's ladies are incredibly lucky. We all know that. I can admit to being jealous, but would never say anything terrible about them. If Bret and Jemaine picked them, they must be winners. I'd probably have a girl crush if I met them. I know I can't have one of them...but how about cloning? Right?

You're all gems! And this was a lot I just typed. And I am sooooo sleepy right now... ;
)

meggy wrote:ok, not to be a dink (and im sure im going to come off that way), but if youre going to be on television and sell music commercially and whatnot, you need to understand that you may accumulate fans (both crazy and not crazy). its part of "
being famous"
, so to speak.

this may sound cold hearted or whatever, but i just dont really feel bad that people wait outside their shows to meet them and blah blah blah. i dont think there is anything wrong with wanting to meet your favorite band/actor. i personally just dont think its crazy. no one held a gun to their heads and told them they had to choose this career path. they could have done anything else with their lives and just played music as a hobby or whatever. they picked this, and whether you like it or not, all the fan stuff comes with it. i personally think its respectable and polite of "
famous people"
to meet their fans and show that they appreciate the fact that these people buy their records, watch their movies, etc. do i think that they HAVE to? no, of course not. but i do think its the courteous thing to do.


i have never been to a conchords show and i have never met either of them therefore i have no idea what they're like to their fans, so im not trying to bash them. i am just speaking generally. im not tryin' to hate!

I couldn't have said it better myself